The Chinese meal prior to the show was I assumed going to be the highlight of my first live opera…

I chose fried squid as a starter – boring – tasteless an effort to swallow and impossible to digest…

Exactly as I assumed opera would be…

Of course I realise Madame Butterfly is set in Japan…

But sushi would have been a step too far…

I’d joked beforehand I’d hoped there’d be subtitles…

Surprisingly there was – however the opening song had me worried…

I seriously thought I was watching an estate agent’s pitch to music…

Bloke One: “It’s a lovely house with sliding doors..”

Bloke Two: ” Do the doors slide..?”

Bloke One: “Yes the doors slide…”

All sang with a gusto that in Italian sounded far more interesting…

So the plot…

Butterfly – Amanda Roocroft – is 15 and has been sold to US sailor Pinkerton for 100 Yen…

I kinda squirmed a little over this…

I mean child prostitution – pedo’s and all that…

Now if this had been a “modern musical” the Sun would have it shut down lol…

She was meant to be 15 but even the pancake make-up couldn’t hide that…

But hey how many 15-year-old Japanese opera singers are there..?

In all honesty she had one hell of a voice and wasn’t at all the shrieking fat lady I’d expected…

Pinkerton – played with disinterest by Russell Thomas – is a stereotypical sailor with a girl in every port…

He just wants to deflower this child bride then bugger off on sea faring adventures…

Men – typical…

Given Thomas is black – this kinda brings in Michael Jackson undertones…

As we are led to believe the blonde blue eyed boy in the second part is his son…

But I digress and I guess nitpick lol…

He just annoyed me – whilst everyone else was doing their best to be animated…

He seemed to shuffle about the stage smirking nodding and pulling up his trousers…

An annoying habit that really started to grate lol…

OK let’s talk about Suzuki – the sexy Claire Bradshaw…

She’s Butterfly’s maid – and the highlight for this babe blogger…

A sassy cheeky feisty performance with the voice of an angel…

Underneath the make-up and dowdy costume I thought a hottie lurked…

Come on I am a babe blogger haha…

Googling her this morning means I haven’t lost my touch…

photo: WNO

Indeed a hottie…

She can certainly hold a tune and totally took over the stage (she was on a lot)…

Man what this babe doesn’t know about sliding doors – she opens and closes them often!!!

OK back to the opera…

Given she’s marrying a Yankee – Butterfly has apparently converted to Christianity…

Her family – led by the scary baldy Priest – ain’t at all happy…

In fact the cast all pile on stage and sing about their displeasure – loudly…

Now this was opera I thought…

Lot’s of folks rushing around shrieking…

Curiously for me not a fat lady in sight lol…

So much for “they think it’s all over – it is now – the fat lady is singing…”

Once they’ve all disappeared off for a costume change…

PInkerton begins his seduction – or grooming as I felt a modern twist might be…

He sings to get into her knickers…

She seems eager and sings as much…

Curtain down…

It had flown by – absolutely flown by…

I was enthralled immersed and lovin’ it…

Even my sore back – a curse – seemed manageable…

Act two began with the tune of the show – Un Bel di Vedremo…

OOooo I’m getting the shivers and tingles now…

Beautiful – truly beautiful…

As you would expect from a sea faring bad boy…

He’s found another bride and is returning to claim his child…

It’s been 3 years – Butterfly is skint and resisting another old pervs advances…

Suzuki listens as she warbles about how she’s never lost faith in the bad boy…

Chicks lol…

And then!

A miracle his ship cometh in…

Excited she begins chucking flowers about the place with gay abandon…

I kinda felt myself feeling sorry for the cleaner – the socialist in me I guess…

There’s a truly haunting scene behind the blinds (sliding doors)…

Where in silhouette Butterfly – Suzuki and the boy await the rover’s return…

I didn’t know the plot – but I guessed it wouldn’t end well lol…

It doesn’t…

SPOILER ALERT haha…

In a nutshell Pinkerton’s new bride wants the child…

Butterfly kills herself curtain down…

Wow…

OK this might not have been the best production ever…

What do I know – after all I’m an opera virgin…

The scenery might have been a little drab if annoying…

Sliding doors – do these doors slide – yes these doors slide…

The costumes might not have been that convincing…

And at times the orchestra felt the need to raise their games…

Drowning out whole chunks of singing lol…

But something in me stirred…

I loved it – absolutely adored it…

I’ve taken some stick over this – but hey I like opera…

No – I adore the opera – can’t wait for the next one…

As to the fried squid…

Delicious and very very moorish…

The fat lady is singing…

ASHLEY MADISON DISCREET SEX DATING